One of These Things is Not Like the Other

I couldn't find "Her Royal Highness" the other day and went through the house calling for her.  I had checked the closet once before but the second time when I yelled, "Mamie!!", a snout, pair of eyes and one ear popped out of the dress pants section looking at me like, "WHAT is it Mother?!!"

What's even better, you can tell where she had wallowed in my pants by the askew hangers.

Someone in a Control Room is Thinking, "Who the Heck did they Hire?"

As a state employee, I am pretty sure my internet searches are monitored.  If not, joke's on me because I am on my best Google-behavior.  Not that I ever look at inappropriate subject matter - I just have decided that J.Crew, YouTube and Gap can wait until after 4p.m.

However, if I am being Big-Bothered, the following searches have been recorded (not that Gap is less appropriate):

Umbro

How tall was Elvis?  (By the way, 5'11)

Preventing birds from flying into windows

Maximum daily caffeine intake

Leon Phelps
 

Pet goats

Goat on a leash (I swear)

Effects of eating expired yogurt

Serial killer handwriting (This probably put me on a "Level Yellow" watch list)

Coca-Cola recipe

Dog stairs

How to bring a tomato plant back to life 

January Jones' Eyebrows


How to make low-fat oatmeal cream pies like Little Debbie (impossible)

Chupacabra
 
Where is Hayley Mills?

Lyrics to Hard Candy Christmas

By the way, I wrote this on my lunch.

Two. Seven.

So my birthday was Tuesday.  Twenty-seven.  Yes, I know that is still very young but I was not too pumped about approaching that number.  However, a few weeks ago (circa age 26) I had one of those moments when I felt the need to embrace the approaching number.  I was feeling extra professional because my boss had just complimented something I had done.  As soon as I sat down at my desk the phone rang.

Very Old Gentleman:  Are you the public affairs officer there?

Very Professional Feeling, 26 Year Old Me: Yes sir, I am.

Very Old Gentleman:  I have an idea I would like to tell you about.

Very Professional Feeling, 26 Year Old Me: O.K.  Shoot.

Very Old Gentleman: Hun, if you don't mind me asking, how old are you?

A Little Less Professional Feeling, 26 Year Old Me: TWENTY SEVEN.

Very Old Gentleman: Well you sound like you're 12.

And just like that, I was knocked from my high horse.

I had a good birthday.  Especially because at work, you get your birthday off.  I spent the day shopping and eating with Courtney and Irish.  That evening, Beau took me to dinner.  Then we met our friends Tiffany and Cody at Lemon Tree, a new yogurt shop in town.  After that we all went back to the house to visit. 

In addition to a great day, I got some good gifts.

Along with a T.J. Maxx gift card, my mother-in-law gave me a setting of my wedding china. 

She also gave me some old Reader's Digest books, although they were not part of my b-day gift.  She had just gone through a closet and found them.  Lucky me!!!!

 

They have adorable, vintage covers.  I love them.



 Beau gave me this beautiful 14-carat gold necklace.

 And because he says I have the music taste of a 40-year old, Phil Collins.

And perhaps the best gift, Dolly. I have had "Jolene" on repeat ever since.

I'm not sure why the dog is in this picture other than the fact that she is nosy and wanted to see what I was holding. 

While we were at the in-laws the other day, Leslie was showing me the guest bedroom she had re-arranged.  There were a few boxes sitting on the floor to which she said, "Those came out of the closet and I have yet to go through them."  Before she could finish the sentence, Mamie was snout first in the boxes checking them out.  I was all, "Get out of those Nosy Rosie!! Leslie, I have no idea where she gets that from." (In reference to her nosy-ness.)  Ten seconds later I was going through the boxes saying, "What is in here?"  Like mother, like Heeler mix.

Happy Father's Day

The following message will mean more to my dad than anything else:

Dear Dad,

After all those years of wearing the braces you paid for, I still wear my retainer.

Love,

The Middle Child

National Flag Day

Today is National Flag Day.  Flag Day, the anniversary of the Flag Resolution of 1777, was officially established by the Proclamation of President Woodrow Wilson on May 30th, 1916. While Flag Day was celebrated for years after Wilson's proclamation, it was not until August 3rd, 1949, that President Truman signed an Act of Congress designating June 14th of each year as National Flag Day.

There is your history lesson for the day. You're welcome.

To throw some humor in this post, I will pull from Beau's Facebook status for the day:

"On this day in 1777, France adopted the white flag as their national symbol."

Open Mouth and Insert Foot

My mouth tends to get me in a lot of trouble.  Talking is a nervous habit for me.  I wish it was foot tapping or hair chewing or something else less abrasive.  When I am in an uncomfortable situation I tend to say things I shouldn't, not inappropriate things, just my real thoughts.

Two weeks ago my  friend Sara's husband Matt invited us for a surprise birthday dinner for her at a local restaurant.  I had met Matt once so I still felt the need to be on my best behavior.  Sara and I became friends at work.  She had just moved to the state and come to find out, lived in the same county as me.  I informed her that because of our close proximity, I was going to make her my new friend.  Bless her heart, she has enjoyed the full "Kendall Experience" ever since.

Beau was supposed to meet us for dinner but got stuck at work leaving just Sara, Matt and me.  The subject of children came up and that is when it got dicey.  You see, they have been married for eight years (forgive me if I'm wrong, Sara) and have not jumped on the children train.  I too am in no hurry for kids so I always felt comfortable complaining to Sara about the pressure one gets about having children (cough, cough, Mother).  It's not just that, I also have a decent amount of guilt for not wanting children right now.  I want them someday, just not today (or tomorrow).  I'm no kid lover (please don't spray paint hateful things on my house for this confession).  I don't don't do needy and clingy people which pretty much eliminates children. I like selective ones like my nephews and best friend's daughter but after a few hours of them, I am ready to say good-bye.

Somehow these sentiments came spilling out while at dinner with Matt and Sara.  Although I was comfortable around Sara, I had not been around Matt a lot so was a little nervous and dangerously chatty when I gave my speech about kids not being in my immediate future for the following reasons:

• You cannot go to Target whenever you so please.  (That's a big one.)
• I don't do well without sleep
• Crying babies/children make my skin crawl
• I am always paranoid that any child over the age of six months is trying to manipulate me
• Kids don't understand sarcasm, my second language

*I swear I am not a horrible person and that I'm not that selfish, I just am not a kid person.  If anything, you should be thankful I am not a teacher*

After my rant I really did not get much of a response from the couple but did not think much of it, moved on to another subject and planned another get together for the following Friday when Beau could make it.

That Friday night we went over to Matt and Sara's and were joined by our friend Chassity (who holds the same sentiment for marriage as I do kids).  We were sitting at the table when I noticed Sara was drinking caffeine free Coke.  She loves, loves, loves Coke so I felt the need to blurt out, "Wow Sara!  Really getting wild and crazy with the caffeine free Coke tonight, huh?!!"  Sara looked at Matt then looked at me, "I'm pregnant."

If dying was an option, I would have picked it when I remembered all the things I had said to them a few nights prior.  Sara only rubbed salt in the wound when she said, "I was going to tell you at dinner the other night but didn't want to make you feel bad about what you said."  Of course Beau and Chassity were all, "What did you say, Kendall?"  All I could get out was that I thought I stopped short of saying kids are horrible little creatures.  Beau, being the supportive husband he is, turned at me and said, "You are a very bad person."

Thank the Lord, Matt and Sara thought the whole thing was hilarious and were not upset at all. She is a fellow blogger and said she is preparing a post on peoples' reactions.  I believe mine still holds up as her favorite.  The rest of the night I was deservedly on the receiving end of all the jokes. The "things you should never say to a pregnant woman" joke was played into our board games and it never got old.

As for me, I have sworn off ever discussing my sore spot to another woman in the child bearing age again. 

Busy, Busy, Busy

 The new job has been very busy lately.  No complaints here.  I still love it. 

I went to a meeting in Rogers, AR the other day.  I had to leave super early since the meeting began in the morning.  I try to avoid hotel stays when possible.  Sleeping in a bed without a 45 pound mutt using your legs as a pillow just isn't home.

I took the above picture of the fog rolling off the flooded rice fields.

On Wednesday me, my boss and one of the state veterans' commissioners visited Birdeye, AR (northeast part of the state) where the new state veterans cemetery is being built.  On the way we made a stop in Bald Knob (I know, right) where Train No. 844, a Union Pacific locomotive built in 1945 was leaving for Little Rock.  The historic steam engine was brought to Arkansas because of a recent contest where people voted on the state the train would visit.  Our state won (we may be little but we are mighty...online voters.)

Governor Beebe met the train in Bald Knob and rode it to Little Rock.  Because the commissioner we were with is good friends with the governor, he suggested we see the train and visit with Beebe for a little while.

 The train was impressive.  I love the sound of the steaming whistle.

What kind of Arkansan would I be if I didn't get a picture next to the train? 

Here is the governor before they left.

 Once we made it to Birdeye we got to see the cemetery construction.  Seeing a cemetery being built was a first for me. The day we were there was the day they were placing the crypts. It is odd, I must admit, being in an environment where burying people is the daily norm but it is so important that our veterans have a dignified and deserving final resting place.  Of course we do a lot more than cemeteries.

The cemetery will be beautiful when it opens in the fall.  The tree in the picture is a Red Oak, the oldest type of tree in the state.  There are three (I think) Red Oaks on the cemetery grounds.  We have a tree scientist that visits often to make sure the trees are not being disturbed by the construction.  He has placed lightening rodes around the trees to make sure they do not get hit in a storm.  Part of the construction includes preserving the trees so the public will be able to admire them for years to come.

After our visit we had lunch at the above building.  I thought the same thing you are probably thinking when we pulled up, "There is no way the health department allows this place to operate."  I love a good hole-in-the-wall restaurant but come on, this?  Well the food was amazing.  They have great plate lunches with a meat, three sides and fried cornbread.   I ate a cheeseburger after reading this sign at the counter, "Best burgers in Birdeye.  There's no competition."  Get it?  As you can imagine, there is no other restaurant (or business for that matter) in the town.

On Thursday I got a personal tour of Camp Robinson (Arkansas National Guard and Air Guard base).  A very nice major who is their government liaison showed me the ins and outs of all I will need to know.  We work closely with the Guard on different projects and events so they are important contacts. 

I'm not sure if it was the heat, information overload or the traveling from the days before but once I got back to my office Thursday afternoon, I could have gone to sleep at my desk.  Friday was even worse (we had dinner at some friends' house and got home past my bedtime the night before).  It felt like I was thinking at turtle speed.  I'm glad to report that I have taken a nap every day since Friday and slept hard during the nights in between.  I feel incredibly rested and ready for another busy week, although I'm not sure what is in store yet.



Summery Chicken Pasta Salad

Since it's pushing 100 degrees here in the South, hot meals do not sound remotely appetizing. Last night, I threw some ingredients together to make a cold chicken pasta salad.  Many times my cooking experiments do not turn out well.  This time I got lucky.

Forgive the picture, I could not get it to rotate.

Here's how I made it:

Cook pasta and place in dish

Add grilled chicken

Spinach

Tomato

Feta Cheese

Several splashes of Italian dressing

A splash of balsamic vinegar

A few tablespoons of Ranch mix

Serve hot or cold.  

We had it with pita and hummus.

The Mystery PetCo.com Credit Card Charges Explained

And no, this is not staged.  I got up to for a glass of water and this is what I came back to.