Two weeks ago my friend Sara's husband Matt invited us for a surprise birthday dinner for her at a local restaurant. I had met Matt once so I still felt the need to be on my best behavior. Sara and I became friends at work. She had just moved to the state and come to find out, lived in the same county as me. I informed her that because of our close proximity, I was going to make her my new friend. Bless her heart, she has enjoyed the full "Kendall Experience" ever since.
Beau was supposed to meet us for dinner but got stuck at work leaving just Sara, Matt and me. The subject of children came up and that is when it got dicey. You see, they have been married for eight years (forgive me if I'm wrong, Sara) and have not jumped on the children train. I too am in no hurry for kids so I always felt comfortable complaining to Sara about the pressure one gets about having children (cough, cough, Mother). It's not just that, I also have a decent amount of guilt for not wanting children right now. I want them someday, just not today (or tomorrow). I'm no kid lover (please don't spray paint hateful things on my house for this confession). I don't don't do needy and clingy people which pretty much eliminates children. I like selective ones like my nephews and best friend's daughter but after a few hours of them, I am ready to say good-bye.
Somehow these sentiments came spilling out while at dinner with Matt and Sara. Although I was comfortable around Sara, I had not been around Matt a lot so was a little nervous and dangerously chatty when I gave my speech about kids not being in my immediate future for the following reasons:
- You cannot go to Target whenever you so please. (That's a big one.)
- I don't do well without sleep
- Crying babies/children make my skin crawl
- I am always paranoid that any child over the age of six months is trying to manipulate me
- Kids don't understand sarcasm, my second language
After my rant I really did not get much of a response from the couple but did not think much of it, moved on to another subject and planned another get together for the following Friday when Beau could make it.
That Friday night we went over to Matt and Sara's and were joined by our friend Chassity (who holds the same sentiment for marriage as I do kids). We were sitting at the table when I noticed Sara was drinking caffeine free Coke. She loves, loves, loves Coke so I felt the need to blurt out, "Wow Sara! Really getting wild and crazy with the caffeine free Coke tonight, huh?!!" Sara looked at Matt then looked at me, "I'm pregnant."
If dying was an option, I would have picked it when I remembered all the things I had said to them a few nights prior. Sara only rubbed salt in the wound when she said, "I was going to tell you at dinner the other night but didn't want to make you feel bad about what you said." Of course Beau and Chassity were all, "What did you say, Kendall?" All I could get out was that I thought I stopped short of saying kids are horrible little creatures. Beau, being the supportive husband he is, turned at me and said, "You are a very bad person."
Thank the Lord, Matt and Sara thought the whole thing was hilarious and were not upset at all. She is a fellow blogger and said she is preparing a post on peoples' reactions. I believe mine still holds up as her favorite. The rest of the night I was deservedly on the receiving end of all the jokes. The "things you should never say to a pregnant woman" joke was played into our board games and it never got old.
As for me, I have sworn off ever discussing my sore spot to another woman in the child bearing age again.
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